Idiot

Maybe you've read these but they are pretty funny...and true.

Number One Idiot of 2006

I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at
the poison control center.
Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little
daughter eating ants.
I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there
would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed
down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she
gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants.
I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency
room right away.

Number Two Idiot of 2006

Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to
steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in
getting it out of the plane and home.
Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they noticed a
Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them.
It turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency
locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are
no longer employed at Boeing.


Number Three Idiot of 2006

A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the
Branch and wrote "this. Put all your muny in this bag."
While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he
began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might
call the police before he reached the teller's window.
So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells
Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note
to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his
spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor,
told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was
written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either
have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of
America.
Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK" and left.
He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back
at Bank of America.

Have you ever done anything stupid that makes you feel like an idiot? I have many times. A few weeks ago I dropped the girls off at school and went straight to church....normal routine. I got out of the truck and noticed I had on my house shoes. Marinda got me some nice red house shoes and they are so good I apparently couldn't tell the difference from my regular shoes. Have you ever been driving down the road...listening to your Ipod and reach for the volume button on the car? It doesn't turn up the volume on the Ipod no matter how many times you turn the knob. I've done this before...actually more than once. We do some pretty idiotic things in life sometimes but hopefully they don't mess us up too much. However, as a follower of Christ I mess up all the time. I should pray for someone and I don't, I should encourage someone and I don't, I should do someone a favor and I don't...the list goes on and on. I'm always doing stupid stuff or I don't do the good stuff I need to and therefore I become an idiot.